Teaching your children to do daily chores will have lasting rewards!
There's no way for mothers to teach school (or work outside the home) AND do all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, taxi-driving...with time left over to RELAX!
The Solution? Assign daily chores according to age and ability, then encourage everyone to work as a team, sharing responsibilities.
Getting Started: It's easier to start when little ones want to feel grown-up, but at any age, starting is what's most important.
Instruction & Supervision: Sending a child to do a job without training and encouragement will only produce a poor attitude and little cooperation. Showing the child how to do the chore, working alongside until they understand, will encourage success. Eventually, you'll be able to step out of the room (within hearing distance) but check in every few minutes for encouragement and praise. Let them know how IMPORTANT their work is to the family and WHAT A GOOD JOB they're doing! (We're looking for effort, not perfection! )
Dealing with Complaints: Children of all ages moan and groan but, as loving parents, we need to remember the Goal: to teach future job skills, responsibility, to be a team player and work according to standards (first parents, then employers). ~ The easy way out is to give in and do it yourself, but...
Disciplining Ourselves: When we don't give in, even when it would be easier, teaches the importance of carrying out responsibilities, regardless of how we feel, portrayinging diligence and determination.
Remember, children learn by what we DO...not what we SAY!
Be a Positive Role Model: Yelling, screaming and threatening creates a Battle Zone (and prisoners-of-war usually try to escape!) so doing chores when everyone's fresh, first thing in the morning, often works best.
Stay Positive: No matter how long it took, or even if the chore's not up to your standard, give the child A BIG HUG and say, "Thank you! You did it!" (smile), "Good job! I love you!" (smile), "I not only appreciate what you DO,...I appreciate YOU!" (smile) Corrections can be done later. Children will be much more cooperative when they can look forward to basking in the glow of your approval!
Appreciating Your Husband: Let your children hear you express appreciation for your husband, even though he doesn't, yet, do as much as you'd like. WHATEVER HE DOES,...PRAISE HIM FOR IT! ~ Who knows? Maybe they'll get Dad to do more by working alongside and encouraging him, the same way you encourage them!
A Team Effort Every Evening: Put on the timer for 30 minutes and have everyone RUSH to get the dishes done, pick up toys/books, throw clothes in the washer/dryer, feed the animals, clean out the car or whatever is needed. When the timer goes off, enjoy 30 minutes of games, family walk or other enjoyable activity. Evenings pass quickly but one hour used effectively leaves the rest of the evening free to do other things. Now, Mom can rest, too!
Allowance = A Job Well Done: Receiving an allowance in exchange for chores builds self-confidence. Children grow up knowing they can learn new skills, work under authority and be rewarded for their efforts.
On the other hand, receiving an allowance "just because" makes children feel entitled, self-indulgant, lack sensitivity towards others (who work for it), teaches manipulation (when they want more) and a poor attitude towards work.
Don't worry if they call you a slave driver because their friends don't do chores. It's just part of the dance! They'll thank you when they're older and understand its significance in life.
Delayed Gratification: Being paid an allowance at the end of the week teaches delayed
gratification. Sometimes parents allow children to borrow against their allowance but it can create a dilemna. Think it through as to which would be the best Life Lesson:
